In another article posted on this site, A Bone To Pick With Dr. Dobson: Masturbation, quite a bit of controversy was stirred up over whether or not masturbation was an acceptable act. It amazes me that, although written almost two years ago, this article remains one of the most visited on our site and one that is constantly commented on. The comments are worth reading. My personal favorite was posted recently and basically said that we needed to "stop wasting so much time talking about masturbation, and more time worshipping and praying....Talk is cheap". I agree that talk is cheap, but this statement reveals the substantial lack of understanding that many have about the human person and, specifically, human sexuality. Worshipping God entails living moral lives in accord with His Will.
In this article I would like to focus on several things: 1. What the Catholic Church teaches about masturbation, 2. How masturbation is an "act of disregard", and 3. the moral and physcological dangers of masturbation.
1. What Does The Catholic Church Teach About Masturbation?
2352 By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. "Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action."138 "The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose." For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of "the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved."139
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138 Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith (CDF), Persona humana 9.
139 CDF, Persona humana 9.
Here the Church insists on the proper playing out of human sexual action within the context of marriage and the proper nature of the human sexuality in general. It is important to understand that true love entails BOTH mutual self-giving and the possibility of human procreation. Masturbation prohibits both of these necessary aspects of true love.
2. Masturbation: An Act of Disregard
Disregard, by definition, means to pay no attention to; to treat as unworthy of regard or notice. In this sense there are three things that masturbation disregards:
a. The Proper Use of Human Sexuality Masturbation disregards the innate purpose and use of human sexuality in that it ignores the fact that the body's sexual design and function is directed toward another. Let us consider this in blunt terms. The male's sexual orgasm ends in ejaculation. Ejaculation is the bringing forth, through sexual stimulation, the sperm. So what is the function of the sperm? Is its purpose simply to "climatically end" sexual pleasure? Of course not. Sperm is the male gamete, which, interestingly enough, comes from the Greek word for husband. By definition, gamete is a mature germ cell possessing a haploid chromosome set and capable of initiating formation of a new individual by fusion with another gamete. In other words, the sperm is capable of producing another human being when united with a female egg. Now all of this is elementary and, some might say unnecessary, yet given the reality of what this "climatical end" to male sexual pleasure is how can one justify masturbation which results in the total prohibition and disregard of the very purpose and proper use of male sexuality? Female masturbation likewise falls utterly short of God's design and purpose for human sexuality in that it simply produces a "false" stimulation, deceiving the female reproductive system into a preparatory state for the sexual act without any fulfillment or end. This "false" stimulation robs the sexual act of any self-giving or procreative aspects.
b. Disregard for the "Other" Masturbation disregards the other in two ways. First, if the one masturbating is married, he/she is making use of his/her sexuality without the participation of the very person he/she has given himself/herself to. In other words, the complete gift of self is being compromised. Sexual pleasure is no longer the result of genuine sexual union, that has the capacity of both uniting the two and creating a new life, rather it become an act of selfish individualism and self-gratification with no consideration for the other. Second, masturbation is always stimulated by the meditation on the sexual use of another human being. This means that the person, whether it is one's spouse or not, becomes an "object" that is used rather than truly loved.
c. Disregard of Purity of Heart Christ commands that we be pure of heart (Matt 5:8, 27-30). Masturbation is an act of lust. The Catechism of the Catholic Church states:
2351 Lust is disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure. Sexual pleasure is morally disordered when sought for itself, isolated from its procreative and unitive purposes.
Thus, masturbation, while not specifically condemned by name in Scripture, is in fact condemned by its very attributes.
3. The Dangers of Masturbation
Masturbation is dangerous because it ultimately distorts true sexual pleasure. It creates an illusion or fantasy of what sexual pleasure is. It demands a fantasy, thus the widespread use of pornography by those who masturbate. This self-deception can harm the person's marriage in that the fantasy can become more desirable than real sexual union with one's spouse. Secondly, it instills in the individual a warped outlook toward others. It makes others "objects" for selfish gratification. There is little, if any, love for the object rather simply a desire to use the other for a selfish end. Finally, masturbation is dangerous because it can become an obsessive habit which can lead into greater sexual sins. We have already mentioned pornography, but masturbation also can lead to fornication and/or adultery. Like alcoholism and drug addiction, habitual masturbation craves higher and higher degrees of pleasure. This craving often results in the seeking out of others to fulfill one's sexual desires.
Masturbation is not pleasing to God, nor does it respect the design and purpose of human sexuality. As the late Pope John Paul II once stated:
Within this same cultural climate, the body is no longer perceived as a properly personal reality, a sign and place of relations with others, with God and with the world. It is reduced to pure materiality: it is simply a complex of organs, functions, and energies to be used according to the sole criteria of pleasure and efficiency. Consequently, sexuality too is depersonalized and exploited: from being the sign, place and language of love, that is, of the gift of self and acceptance of another, in all the other's richness as a person, it increasingly becomes the occasion and instrument for self-assertion and the selfish satisfaction of personal desires and instincts. - Theology of the Body, pg. 510
In Christ,
Joe
whenever i feel sad, mad or angry i masturbate. but i love God, and iwant to be close to him, but i can''t stop. I usually repent and say sorry but then i do it a week later. i want to confess it, but i''m afraid my priest won''t look at me the same way again. we have a small church.
forgive me for i have sinned. i''m sorry God. i want to be close to you.
anonymous,
Go to confession every week if you need to - Our Lord awaits you with open arms every time. He loves you so much that he willingly died so that your sins would not destroy you. He values you so much that he established a Church in which its leadership would make themselves personally available to you for the sacrament of confession. No appointment necessary, your priest should be awaiting penitents every Saturday. Do not be afraid of the priest, he knows he has to go to confession too. He is there to heal you, not to punish you.
If you go to confession week after week, the priest will know that you are humble and honest enough to come to God for the help you need. You will be far holier than those who believe they have no need of God's mercy.
You want to be close to God? Remember that he wants to be close to you even more than you do. He will move heaven and earth to be with you. The miracle of confession is greater than the miracle of creating the entire world - for it is harder to repair a soul in mortal sin than it is to begin creation anew (God could have done this without sending his Son to die on the cross). But God loves you so much that he will do this for you repeatedly.
Why do the homeless eat out of trash cans even though it spreads disease? They are so starved for food that the prospect of eating garbage actually appeals to them. When those who love them tell them to stop eating garbage, they are helping them to fulfill their hunger properly, not trying to condemn or starve them.
Why do men masturbate and look at pornography even though it spreads disease through the soul? They are so starved for God's overpowering love that the prospect of indulging in spiritual garbage actually appeals to them. When those who love them tell them to live a chaste life, they are helping them to fulfill their spiritual hunger properly, not trying to condemn or starve them.
Ask God to teach you the true purpose of your sexual desires, ask God to help you to see your sexual desires as gifts. Your efforts to say "no" to masturbation will not succeed until you say "yes" God's design for human sexuality. You must learn God's design for human sexuality before you can say "yes" to it.
Your sexual desires are like rocket fuel, providing the energy to send you out of yourself so that you may reach others and the Lord. When you masturbate, you distort the true purpose of sexuality and imprison your love to focus only on yourself - a foretaste of hell.
When Our Lord heals you and forgives you, your sexual desires remain not because the Lord wishes to torment you but because he is giving you another chance to master your sexual drives so that you may use them for their true purpose. When you master your sexual desires, they will serve you will well - helping you to love others and the Lord eagerly.
Whenever you fall into sin, go to confession so that Our Lord may heal you. Go every week if you need to. You are worth every drop of blood that Our Lord shed for you.
Hello mortals.
I am here to inform you of His Will in regards to the subject of masturbation.
Emarerth Entreri Elsadim Elaksart Emasch.
Nothing is sinful that does not destroy.
Enjoy yourselves and your lives,
that was His purpose.
Stop the senseless killing of sentient life instead of worrying about these trivial things.
I have a problem. Like anonymous above, I also love God alot, and yet I also have a habit of masturbating. Not that its an excuse, but I sort of started by accident and haven't been able to stop. Up until tonight I didn't know that it was sacreligious (I suspected but didn't try hard enough to find out). Tonight I got guilty and finnally confirmed that it was immoral. I want to confess to my priest but I am afraid. I am afraid because I am a [teenage] girl. I do not want to put myself in a dangerous position by admitting to a male that I masturbate. I know I should not feel this way with a priest, but all the priests in my parish got transferred recently and I do not know the new ones well (they don't even speak full english). I'm petrified to tell a man I hardly know this secret I haven't told ANYONE else, especially considering that because I don't know the man, I could be placing myself in danger. however I'm also scared of the fact that I may have unknowingly committed a mortal sin, so I want to confess. But then I tell myself that it wasn't a mortal sin because I didn't fully know that it was sacreligious and I was taught that a sin is only a sin if you know it is wrong and do it anyway. I know that from now on its a sin, so should I just try not to do it again, and pretend I never did? Or could I find a female figure, like a nun, that I could confess to her to clear my conscience? I'm so afraid and confused, please help me.
Hi Clara,
Peace be with you. I understand that this is a difficult topic and a habit that seems harmless, but it has the tendency to darken our conscience in terms of what our sexuality was designed for. The "guilt" you felt was probably a prompting from the Holy Spirit--which is a good thing! God loves you and hates sin. I will pray for you.
To answer your question though you must keep in mind the nature of mortal vs. venial sin. Mortal sin involves sin of grave matter (sexual sins would count), you have full knowledge of the gravity of the sin, and you consent with your full will and knowledge. I am not a priest, but it sounds like you were not fully aware of the implications of your behavior. Talk to your priest though. You do not have to be graphic in your description of the act, but the sin needs to be confessed and the Church has ordained priests not nuns, etc. as confessors. Remember though Clara, there is NO SIN that God will not forgive, nor is the sin you confess the worst that the priest has ever heard. The priest is not there to judge but to help you avoid sin the future. Confession helps to put us in a place to be humble and it is an under utilized but necessary sacrament. If you are truly sorry for your sins God will forgive you and make your conscience and your soul clear. Do not be afraid to confess Clara. Trust that our Lord has given to the Church all the means necessary to see His face. There are no sweeter words than to hear from the priest, "through the ministry of the Church I absolve you of your sins."
Peace,
Matthew
I masturbate every day and I have done so for the last 20 years. Because of a congenital birth defect, I am not married, and I will never marry. Masturbation is the only sexual pleasure that I will ever have. My sperm have never been destined to unite with an egg and I do not believe that it is a sin to destroy them; for me, they are merely bodily waste like urine or sweat. I read nothing in your treatise on masturbation that convinces me that my mastubation is in any way immoral.
What does "Emarerth Entreri Elsadim Elaksart Emasch" mean?
I too am a young christian but I have found a powerful tool to stop masturbating.
Whenever I start getting... urges I immediately pray before they become anything more. A simple "God help me not masturbate today" or something.
You see then I deliberately use the guilt factor, I cant do it now because I just prayed. Safe for one day. That works for me, hope it helps someone out there.
On another note I do not believe masturbation to be evil/sinful in itself. Its great! Its just what comes after.
I find that after I masturbate it takes a week for the urges to becomes easier to control again (hard weeks those are) I also find my eyes and minds slipping more in public and think about sex way more. I just have to batten down and strive through for a while until it gets better. I don't like what I become, thats why i began trying to stop, now one year later I can finally say I have it under control. I slip every couple of weeks but they are becoming rarer and sooner or later I wont masturbate at all again.
Just remember, pray and then use it as a guilt tool. God wont mind, its for a good purpose.
(By the way, don't stretch the rules. Don't say, well I cant masturbate today but I can look at dirty pictures. NO. Its a dark road and trust me you'll end up breaking a streak and masturbating. Just avoid anything and remember to pray the moment you get the thought, before you can think about it too much)
I think Onan practiced coitus interuptis and I never felt that story should have been used as scriptural evidence of masturbation being displeasing to God. Touching and fondling ones genitals begins as a baby. I read as an adolescent that 98% of all boys and girls masturbate; the problem as I see it though is the fanatsy required to reach orgasm. Looking at a picture of a stranger that arouses, I feel is harmless. However, fantasizing about ones neighbor or a live living person you know by name or recognition is highly dangerous and I believe a sin.
Greetings all,
About four months ago I seriously began going to church again. I understand fully how merciful and loving our God is. About two months ago, I found out that masturbation was a mortal sin. I used to masturbate at least once a day, but I've actually managed to sustain for four days straight, but I always succumb to this dirty habit after about four or five days. I know how wrong it truly is, but Satan tempts me like crazy. I've been going to confession every time that I masturbate. My question is, if I were to confess to God alone, would he absolve me and forgive me of this sin if he knows that I am putting forth an honest effort to refrain from the act?
Matt,
Your struggle with your weakness is a common one. Before I answer your question I would like to set the tone with a quote from Saint Gertrude:
"Greater humility, more interior attachment to god. This is the only conclusion you should draw from your failings."
In response to your question:
1. If you make an act of perfect contrition (e.g. confess to God alone out of love for him rather than merely a desire to escape punishment), you will be in a state of grace and need not fear going to hell should you die before having an opportunity to go to confession.
2. The graces available in the confession, however, remain sufficiently important for one who has fallen into mortal sin that one would need to go to confession before receiving communion.
3. Although going to confession within a week of falling into mortal sin is the recommended practice (thus allowing the penitent to receive communion weekly), going to confession once a year is all that is strictly required.
4. If someone falls into serious sin without full consent of the will - it is not clear whether going to confession before receiving communion is strictly required or simply recommended.
When we struggle against the same sin and fail repeatedly, Saint Francis de Sales insists that we show great patience towards ourselves in order to make true spiritual progress.
If you found anything I have said to be helpful in any way, I would highly recommend reading Pardon and Peace by Alfred Wilson in order to gain a more mature understanding of the Sacrament of Penance (http://www.amazon.com/Pardon-Peace-Alfred-Wilson/dp/0912141980). All the material from this post comes from that book.